A Thankful Heart
“Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough” ~Oprah Winfrey
At the dinner table last night, my lovely wife was sharing a story from her work day with our children. She is a mental health therapist who works with school age children in one of our area elementary school buildings. She was telling us that she was doing an exercise on gratitude with her kids this week as the Thanksgiving holiday is just days away and she was surprised to find out that most of the children she was working with had no understanding of the word gratitude, no understanding at all. This despairing revelation sparked off a discussion of why there was a lack of understanding of gratitude at the school with our own children. As with any discussion about a social breakdown, there can be a quagmire of variables that affect the reason of the outcome. There could be numerous reasons why the kids my wife helps failed to understand this basic idea of gratitude (and I’m not going to try and delve into that discussion today either) but the fact remains, these children lack understanding because ultimately, they have never been taught about gratitude.
We all learn differently…some people can pick up a book and learn where others need to hear it from someone else before it makes sense. I’m more a tactile learner as I tend to do best if I can get my hands on a project and learn from doing it. In our society today, fewer and fewer people practice the art of gratitude as we have become a people of entitlement. I know that is a very hash statement to make but the reality is, if you sit and watch the world around you…even examine your own behavior, you might be shocked to realize how much entitlement you feel as well. In short, entitlement is the feeling that a person deserves or is entitled to something they think they deserve…but may not have earned. A simple example is a new employee feeling that they deserve a higher starting pay because they have innovative ideas but have never worked a day in their life versus someone who has put in their time starting on the ground level and learned a job from the ground up. There are hundreds of examples of entitlement, my point being that if you have developed an attitude of entitlement, “I deserve it because…” then you’re less likely to show gratitude and more likely to have feelings of unhappiness or discontentment. It is important to understand gratitude as there are benefits linked to having an attitude of gratitude that have long lasting impact on the happiness and quality of our daily life.
Our ability to feel gratitude and express that gratitude has a profoundly positive effect on us, not just our mental health but to our physical health too. In a 2014 article written by Amy Morin, she extols seven different virtues of having an attitude of gratitude. The first of these is that by expressing gratitude to the people around you, you are more likely to open the door to new relationships (friends) both personally and professionally. Being thankful and having a heart of gratitude improves physical health as grateful people feel less aches and pains and are more likely to take care of their body. Being grateful is good for your psychological health as people who express feelings of gratitude are less likely to feel the toxic emotions of envy, resentment and regret. Having an attitude of gratitude also reduces feelings of aggression and enhances feelings of empathy making you a much better person all round to hang out with. Grateful people also sleep better, have better self-esteem and have a higher level of mental toughness all because they feel thankful for what they have and who they are. Kindness radiates from people who practice the life skill of gratitude because they seem to be in this happy place where they are just thankful for what they have instead of stressing out about what they don’t have. I’m not saying that people who live a life of gratitude don’t have moments where they want something more, but I am saying that they won’t implode if they can’t get what they want right away. They will just happily work towards their goal with a thankful heart until they get it or they will learn to accept life without it…with a thankful heart.
As we approach Thanksgiving this year, look at all the things you might have in your life to be thankful for instead of all the things in life you might think you need to “make” you life “better”. Thankfulness takes practice, but I promise you, the more you practice it, the happier you will become, and all the other “stuff” of life will come into perspective. Happy Thanksgiving everyone, take care of yourself and each other, remember, we’re all in this together.
Wm Reid
Best Home Care Services
325 N Eastern Ave
Connersville, IN 47331
765-827-9833
wmreid@bhcshealth.com